Whichever journey you take, with or without a partner, family support, conservative or liberal, you are determined to make a baby.

Expense is often a crippling, socioeconomic restriction, as health insurance does not cover the exorbitant costs infertility incurs. Like so many health issues, only the upper echelon of society gets to indulge in comprehensive health care, leaving the lower income demographics to languish.
Having grown up in England with the government funded, National Health Service, I find it appalling and archaic that the US has such an unjust, corrupt dichotomy between income related wellness for our citizens.

But I digress, and hope to offer support for your choice to bring a baby, a human being from the spirit world into the earthly plane, onto the planet to share your universe, whichever way works best for you.

Often we women are innately maternal, with our dolls, our kittens, newborn cousins, and we know deep within that we want to become mothers, whether a career is in our future, we are LGBTQ, we are adopted, abandoned, single, only children, we just have a yearning to mother.
And some girls don’t.

The paradox is, once Baby is born, the yearning maternal Mama may flip on her head and freak, while the less maternal Mama might fall deeply in love and her life spins on in retrograde.
The same applies to men who partner together to make Baby.

Regardless of your psychology, your journey is utterly unique and full of surprises, and it’s best to be prepared for all and sunder, so as not to disrupt the status quo of having an infant human in your arms.

If a surrogate is involved, an unusual bond may form. You may have discussed your involvement with the pregnancy, your influence in diet, lifestyle, health etc. You may participate in wellness appointments, ultra-sounds, birth classes. Your engagement is paramount to bonding with Baby, therefore you and your partner have a direct influence over Baby’s development.

If you are experiencing the intensity of Invitro, the hormonal explosions, the shots, the numerous doctor visits, and the anticipation, failures and successes, then you might need to make the distinct decision to become your partner’s advisory! The disruption to your endocrine system is extraordinary, hence the emotional rollercoaster unparalleled. Your partner may need some instruction here, reading literature on what you are experiencing will take the onus off you – and elicit the empathy required for your relationship to survive. If your rounds of IVF end in disappointment, allow your hormones to normalize and your grief to morph into Plan B. Plan Baby. Any which way you can.

If you are simply trying the good old fashioned way of conceiving, (or artificial insemination), focus on female pleasure. If the Mama-to-be is experiencing the spasms of orgasm in her uterus she is far more likely to intercept the semen ejaculated into her cervix. The musculature in the vagina draws the sperm deeper when waves of pleasure roll through her. Before ejaculation bring her to climax, (or encourage her to self-pleasure), and after ejaculation indulge her further.

Regardless of your conception method, don’t lose sight of the pleasure, the love and the partnership. Being consumed with a positive pregnancy test does not a romance make.